Broken
by Glambertxxx
Summary: Kris and Adam don't know what to do anymore, they feel like they can't keep carrying on with their secret relationship. Should they end it? Should they flaunt it? See what they decide. soundtrack: Broken by Lifehouse


I wrote this FF because I woke up to the tweet Adam Lambert posted about the P!nk concert with his "boyfriend" Drake, and I can't stand Drake. lol I'm all Kradam and I got all emotional and felt for Kris so I got the idea for this story and wrote it in less than twenty minutes. Enjoy & review. =)

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Adam please," Kris pleaded between sobs, "please Adam, I can't live like this anymore."

The pillow Kris rest his face on was coated in tears as was his beautiful face. He gripped the pillow tightly with his fist and his face was in pain from being contorted from consistently crying for the past thirty minutes.

"I can't Adam, please, I can't," he continued begging.

Adam was sitting on the same bed but his back was turned to face away from the man sobbing on his pillow. He turned his head around to the view of Kris shaking and pounding his fist down on the blanket, it broke his heart. And his face, Kris' face just didn't look the same. As if he was trying to squeeze more tears out of his eyes.

"Adam, Adam please," Kris said one last time as Adam finally gave in and turned to coil his body around the smaller man. With his strong tan freckled arm wrapped tightly around Kris pulling his close to him, he could feel Kris shake.

"I'm sorry, you know I am," Adam whispered.

"Then prove it," Kris snapped back through tears.

"Prove what Kris? Prove what? You're the one that is ashamed of me, not the other way around, I should be the one here shaking and crying," Adam snapped while beginning to tear up himself.

Kris buried his face in the pillow and Adam could hear the muffled sound of him crying out, it sounded like "I love you", but Adam ignored it.

"I haven't told anyone about this for you, for you! I wish I could just shout it from the rooftops baby, I wish I could just scream 'IM IN LOVE WITH KRIS ALLEN' but I can't, I can't" Adam started strong but was now crying just as hard as Kris was.

Kris turned his body around to face Adam, threw his arms around him and buried his damp face in Adam's chest.

"I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry," Kris said muffled in Adam's shirt.

Adam placed his hand on the back of Kris' head and pulled him closer. "It's not your fault baby, don't blame yourself."

"But it is my fault," Kris said pulling back from Adam's chest to look up at the man he wanted more than anything on this planet. "I'm the one who is holding this back, I want to be all yours. I want to walk down the street holding your hand as the paparazzi shoots pictures and not give a damn. I'm just afraid to come out to the public." Kris paused for a silent sob up against Adam's chest, "and let Katy know, it will break her heart, I can't do it, baby I can't live like this anymore."

"Neither can I," Adam said with his hand up against the younger mans cheek. "I love you, so so much," Adam continued as Kris winced and more tears developed in his gorgeous brown eyes. "I can't do this anymore, if you aren't willing to do anything to be with me, I can't do it anymore, my heart is broken, right in half baby. I hate to force you to make a decision, you know I'm not like that, it's been over a year Kris, I can't...I just can't," Adam buried his face in the pillow and was making silent cries.

Kris' face as Adam told him this was in a shocked state. His mouth was opened, his eyes, still watering, were wide. He knew this day would come eventually, the day that Adam told him he couldn't do it anymore. And Adam was right, this secret relationship had taken its tole on both of them, it was effecting everything in their lives. They either needed to end it, or Kris had to sacrifice everything in his life to be with Adam.

"I'll do it Adam, I'll do it, I'll tell Katy, I'll come out. If it means that I can have you and you have me for the rest of our lives. I'd do anything, please Adam. I'm ready...I'll do anything," Kris told Adam while running the soft part of his thumb against Adam's cheek catching his tears, then collapsed up against Adam's chest gripping him closer and closer. "Just don't leave me, please don't leave me, I love you with all my heart, I will do anything for you, don't leave meeeeeeee."

"Kris," Adam cried out. "Kris," Adam kissing the smaller man on his forehead, "baby, I can't let you do that, I can't let you ruin your life for me, I don't deserve it."

"Yes you do," Kris sobbed into Adam's shirt damp with his tears. "'I love you' doesn't mean anything unless I am willing to give up everything for you, I can't see my life without you in it, Adam you are my everything, I won't let you go, I can't let you go, I love you, oh god I love you," Kris said moving in and closing the distance in their mouths.

Adam rest his hand on the small of Kris' back and the younger mans arms were wrapped tightly around his lover. Their kiss was so passionate, and delicate, so loving, but rough as if fighting for dominance. Their lips quivered against each other because they were still both sobbing. Adam moved his hand to cup Kris' cheek to kiss the man he was going to spend the rest of his life with deeper. About ten minutes later Adam pulled back to look at his soul mate, yes that is what he was, his soul mate.  
"Did you really mean that? You would do anything for me?," Adam asked before kissing Kris with a small peck again.

"You are everything inside me that I wish I could be but don't have the courage to become, you are my everything, and I would sacrifice the world for you Adam Lambert," Kris smiled through his tears.

Adam smiled meekly before they engaged in an slow smooth loving delicate kiss. A few minutes later Kris lay his head on Adam's chest and his lover pet his head of dark brown spiky hair. They closed their eyes and fell asleep. They both knew that the life they were about to enter would be hard, but somehow they both knew it would be all worth it, if they got to be together, nothing else mattered.


End file.
